“They’re not great puppies if they’re fake!”
E@L votes with Sasha on this one...
Great non-fake puppies! (Link NSFW!)
Bruce was telling me, after he gave the girls MY phone-number and they kept SMSing me last night ("you busy, nice man?"), that the gravity-defying breasts on one of his weekend *conquests* were great to look at but that they felt horrible. You could palpate the contours of the bag, feel it slide separately from the flesh, he said. About as sexy as a fondling a plastic bag of saline.
Which is what he was doing.
In fact it felt like someone had simply stuffed a coupla big plastic bags of saline just under her skin.
Which is what they had done.
Might be nice for a soapy, but that's about all.
Which reminds me. Before Bruce forced us to catch up with his "friends" (kadink, kadink) at Queens in the 4FoWs, he took E@L down into Brix, at the Hyatt. Never been there before. Told you I don't get out much.
Bruce was determined not to pay the $25 entrance fee. Never paid one in me life, he lied, whispering to E@L . He just kept talking as he walked slowly forward. Bruce is built like a miniature tank, solid and unstoppable.
"The entrance fee will get me a free drink, right?" he asked.
"Yes first drink included."
"But it's just the houe pour, right?"
"Yes, is house pour."
He was still moving inexorably (ineluctably?, inevitabably? inexcusabably?) forward as he conversed...
"Well I don't drink house pour! It's shit. Why don't I just buy a good expensive drink instead?"
"You muss buy ticket, get house pour!" the poor girl was crying out. The bouncer was walking backwards in front of Bruce, smiling.
"But if I buy a really good drink, not your crap house pour, you've still made your money..."
"Is everything all right?" Over came the manager.
""Yes," said Bruce, still moving forward and now shaking the manager's hand, "this gentleman [the bouncer] is taking us to the bar, where we can purchase some of your finest spirits and liquors."
"Certainly sir, enjoy your evening..." said the manager with a generous sweep of his hand.
And we are in. E@L creeping slowly, trying not to be noticed (HA!), behind Bruce.
And we are at the bar!
"Two Absolut and tonics!" calls Bruce, giving
E@L a wink.
OTHER MONKEYS SAID
That Bruce he is a right cagey bastard huh?
And from what I remember of the evil experiences I have had with him, he does not really care if the puppies are fake or not. ~grin~
Not sure if you have actually met Bruce... OK, maybe once, in the dark of night. Which is where he lives when he comes to town...
We are all one in the brotherhood of the love of puppies ~grin~
I've yet to experience what a pair of "fake puppies" feel like. I'm curious, I've been told they feel really different.
Did see plenty of them in OT, when I was accompanied there by two gentlemen *cough*. I remember one woman had breasts that were not so much puppies as Great Danes, remember thinking that you could feed a small imporverished African nation with those tits.