Japglish to English Required
Part of my new role as the only native English speaking person in the marketing division of the company is to review and correct translations of marketing material...
Paragraph 1, Line 1 starts thus...
Design that doesn't show it off, though advanced function is built into.
Sixteen densely written pages of this BabelFish output to be sorted into typical E@L coherence and slickness by next Wednesday.
The long weekend in Bangkok coming up may not be quite the party fest and grand tour of the City of Angels I had hoped it would be. I'm thinking it's more likely I'll be lying by the pool with my laptop, my Shorter Oxford, Longman's Dictionary of English Idiom, my Fowler's English Usage, my Strunk and White, and Roget's thesaurus, directing the explorations of my first time guest to Bangkok by SMS...
Anticipated SMS Exchange
Me: Nvr fall love with br-grl. Special not from Angelwitch Nana Plza
Him: How mch shd I pay br-fine? How mch tip?
Me: Long time short time?
Him: What u imply? Short c*ck? [He has issues.]
Me: 600Bht +++ GST
Me: Good Sex Time. 1500 - 2000Bht
Him: I not on yr slary!
Me: Up 2 u! Like trip 2 Vegas. Spend big $ and f lucky u win big. F unlucky u need big medication.
OTHER MONKEYS SAID
And what if he just keeps it in his pants?
And I do not have an issue, at least not about that. ~lol~
Who said I was talking about you? Sensitive...
I love having you two in the same room! You two are just totally adorable together....and it totally fulfills my threesome fantasy. Mmmmm...
By the way darl, I just had a little catnap and dreamt that you and I got down and dirty.LOL!
We'll think of you in BKK...
And I have that dream all the time! Only I'm awake!